Rapper Katrina Taylor, better known as Trina, has had to navigate some tough events over the last few years. The 45-year-old appeared on the Tamron Hall Show last week to discuss her first book, “Da Baddest,” and some of the grief she’s still working through.
In the opening of her show, Hall read a powerful excerpt from Trina's new book, where she reflected on the miscarriage she experienced during the early stages of her career while dating rapper Lil Wayne. The two were together from 2005 to 2007 and were briefly engaged. Trina shared that societal stigmas surrounding pregnancy, particularly as a female rapper, along with the demands of her work, made it difficult for her to properly grieve the loss at the time.
“I would cry on the road, I would cry on the tour bus, I would cry in a hotel, but I would have to hit the stage that night. I would have to get on a plane that morning, I would have to do whatever I was doing,” she expressed. “So it was something that you kind of like swept under the rug.”
She continued, “I was so young and I was just, I was hurt. I was sad inside. I just started questioning things that I believe in and why me. You know, I didn’t understand. Like, was it something that I did wrong? Like, why? I blame myself so much for it.”
(Stanlo Photography.)
Trina's miscarriage was just the beginning of a series of heartbreaking losses. In 2013, she endured the devastating murder of her 19-year-old brother, Wilbrent Bain Jr., who was killed in a shooting. On the show, Trina also opened up about how her brother's death plunged her into a dark and difficult period of her life.
“But the loss of my brother is when life went dark for me. And to the world, they see it as, you know, happy, smile, and just keep pushing. But for me, since 2013, my life was dark until now. Since 2013 when I lost my brother, I just felt so disconnected from the world. I felt like I wanted my life not to be here.
Trina continued to share about how she was hit with another blow when her mom died in 2019. “I really stopped believing in everything that I believe in life. Like I just felt like God, ‘what are you doing? Why is this me?,” she said tearfully. “I just started breaking down. I don’t understand how do you live without your mom?”
“If my back was against the wall, my mom was always there. She’s never not been there for me. When she wasn’t here, I just felt alone in the world,” she continued. The rapper also lost her 17-year-old niece to a shooting in 2022. Although the loss has been overwhelming, Trina has been able to experience some glimmers of joy, such as recently getting married. She tied the knot with her partner, Benjamin Leon Kearse Jr., aka Swurv, on May 22 in Miramar, Florida.
Trina also mentioned that it was important for her to tell her own story. With being controlled and hushed in the industry for so many years, it is important that she tells her own while she still can. "Da Baddest" is available now and can be purchased here.
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